Washed up and middle aged

Washed up and Middle Aged

I had a comment put on  my one YouTube video yesterday which really made me chuckle.

The comment said and I quote “Why do middle aged, washed up,  unattractive and overweight women in this game represent themselves as being young and attractive”.

Im guessing that was a personal dig/comment aimed at me. I mean  I  could assume it was aimed at someone else but as it was put under one of my videos then it was aimed at me.

Why did it make me chuckle. Let me tell you. I have regularly received such hateful remarks and as frustrated as I could get over them and feel the need to dramatically exit doing my thing, I choose not to.

I choose to swim against the tide and make no doubt about it, I am a strong swimmer despite the awful hateful things I get called.

You see, I am not easily bullied,  that I feel I need to leave because one persons perception of me along with their cronies is to “encourage me” by regularly passing insult. I can get hurt yes, but it lasts moments.

A great guy said this to me. “Behind every troll there is an insecure, sleep deprived, ugly hating  soul. Their sole existence is  about hating others in order to make themselves feel better about themselves, yet deep down, they do not ever reach that better feeling.”

Sadly in the Vlogger/Blogger community part of Second Life there is this competitive negative force and people feel the need to behave in ways they deep down know they wouldn’t or shouldn’t ordinarily. That competitiveness is destructive and not community based.

Yet behind the keyboard these people turn into playground bullies and think it is ok to behave so.

I grew up in an era of the saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never harm me” For me, that is very true. They hurt, but I forget a day later.

But for others the harm can be real. If you are one of these soul destroyed people who feels the need to behave so in order to either boost yourself or ingratiate yourself to someone else. Stop and think.

The words that you spout on social media, has direct impact and can very much harm a person and you would be responsible.

But I need to add to  that person who follows me to pop the dislikes regularly and the insulting comments via their alternate YouTube accounts and their cronies. Last time I checked myself out in the mirror, I am neither washed up, unattractive or hugely overweight. Yes I am middle aged, I own that. But believe me, you will get there one day too!

I am a professional in real  life, I have qualifications, I have a family, I have children who have great careers and I have a grandson and I have great close friends.

I also have a past of fighting against abuse and bullies for being the person I am and for how I have looked. I was a model back in the day and because of how I looked I suffered a great deal of bullying from that part of life and sexist behaviour’s from a male dominated work force.

In my virtual world, I can be who I want to be. So if I want to be a lithe blonde then I will be a lithe blonde, If I want to be Chubby Marika, then I will be. If I want to be a buxom Thelma, then that is who I will be. Harriet, I will be her any day.

After all it is my Second Life and I will do as I please because I pay my way to be here.

If any of my readers find themselves in this situation, I want you to know I am soon to create something that I believe will help all the people who are feeling bullied, trolled, made to feel not good enough etc.

As a community, we need to stand up and say hell no to all the bullies.

Credits:-

Hep top and leggings from I M Collection

Hep flat shoes fromI M Collection

Ruky pose from Lyrium at the EQUAL10 Event

Gem eyes  from Amara Beauty

Glam on eyeshadow from A R T E

Zafirah lipstick from A R T E

Shakira hair from DOUX

Catya bento head from CATWA

Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz

Lara mesh body Maitreya

Edie  skin in 04 from  Amara Beauty

Shot on location at The Peak beach area

 

Coffee at Baja Norte #Be Kind on social media

Coffee at Baja Norte #Be Kind on social media

I have decided to bring forward my Coffee with Isa from a Monday to a Sunday.

With no blog on a Monday morning at all.

I am just switching it around for the heck of it. I plan to do more Sansar videos and will relegate them to Mondays and people can choose to watch or not depending on their interest.

In todays Coffee I am touching on something that troubles me of late and that is the behaviour of people on Social media, particularly in the virtual community. It seems to be getting worse and not better and so I am running a poll on this which the link will be at the start of the video to gain insight into how people are feeling about it.

Its a simple yes or no answer and no indication of who you are at all. I felt I would rather do it that way than put anyone in the position of a comment which may bring them any detriment in any way, shape or form.

Video:-

Credits:-

Andrea outfit from Osmia at the EQUAL10 Event

Hera  hair from Kuni at the EQUAL10 Event

Gem eyes  from Amara Beauty

Tropical eyeshadow from A R T E

Sweet gloss lipstick from A R T E

Catya bento head from CATWA

Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz

Lara mesh body Maitreya

Shot on location at Baja Norte

Are you mentally aware?

Are you mentally aware?

I have just finished my week long course on Mental Health awareness. It is mental health week as well in case you are not aware.

I feel more drained and really aware right now. Because with more knowledge comes the awareness and the realisation of how fragile people are and how people who lack social skills can severely damage them.

Frankly what I have heard and seen this week has really brought so much more home to me how little things to us are monumentally huge to others.

Bullies and trolls are the underbelly of society. They are the underbelly of the virtual worlds we reside in, the underbelly of social media and the underbelly of families who don’t realise they have them in their midst.

By laughing along, you become the same.

Maybe stop and think before you mock and make fun of people around you, because you don’t know the damage you are in fact doing.

Because if you do laugh along, you too are also lacking in social human skills. You then join the underbelly.

Now ask yourself, “Am I socially and mentally aware?”

Credits:-

Accent on legs dress from the IM Collection now at the Designer Showcase

Gem eyes  from Amara Beauty

Tropical eyeshadow from A R T E

Oline lipstick from A R T E

Livia hair from Truth

Catya bento head from CATWA

Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz

Lara mesh body Maitreya

Edie  skin in 04 from  Amara Beauty

Ittty bitty isn’t it

Ittty bitty isn’t it

Need I say more!

Itty bitty ha ha

Clearly a non You Tube moment because well…

It’s Saturday and man I’m glad it is. This week has been the week from hell and beyond.

The usual clique culture that makes you question why people behave in this gang type of culture.

I came into work after being out of the office on training for a week. Discovered that one lady had left. I know why she left.

She found the isolation and singling out by the cliques hard to deal with and so had gone. She just didn’t come back.

But since then, they’re still doing it. Still gossiping about her and still bullying even though she isn’t present any longer.

I do wonder when cliques get together, do they ever stop and think about the mental damage they do to the person they single out?

I’m guessing no one stops to consider that.

I’ve never liked cliques and never been part of any.

I like to make my own mind up and not be driven by the views of others.

I just wish more people would be less led and more independent of influence.

Maybe there would be less bullying in the world and less people who feel alone and isolated. Who knows.

Suffice to say it has affected my week because you can’t win against those types of bullies because as a pack they don’t hear or see sense. Until it happens to them.

I’m one of the people amongst a few the clique likes to affect. The only difference with me is, I am never driven out by anyone and in fact often stand my ground despite the anguish it causes me, just to prove that point.

What goes around, comes around. And ladies, it’s certainly coming around….

If you are subject to bullies you can find help

Here and Here

 

Pics :-

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Credits:-

Nightmare dress from ::OOPS:: at the XXX Event

Run the world hair from Exile

Catya bento head from CATWA

Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz

Lara mesh body Maitreya

Christy dark skin Lara Hurley

Shot on location at Luanes World

Contemplation

Contemplation

Good morning

So I’m sat here on my bus headed to work and after yesterday’s troller drama, You Tube have taken down that strike that some silly person attempted to make against my account.

It does go to show we need to stick up for ourselves.

Don’t be intimidated by individual or group troublemakers that invade what we do. Tackle them head on and fight our cause.

Well in saying that I’m not advocating a punch up in a back street alley. I’m saying don’t feel you can’t stand up for yourself when it comes to your social media.

You don’t have to be bullied and trolled. Report them. Raise awareness. Don’t allow the silly people to get away with it.

My situation with You Tube.Unfortunately You Tube have a bot system which reacts when someone raises a false claim. The bot system is automatic but once you appeal and report they do actually look further into it.

If you don’t bother and just accept what has happened then it stays. So always stand up for yourself if you get an issue.

And if you can’t, get someone to help you.

Have a lovely day.

DRESS

Credits :-

Anzu hair by Argrace

Liziah outfit from Enigma at the TWE12VE

The outfit consists of  dress, shoes and choker

Self reflection bento pose from Luanes World

40’s lipstick from A R T E

Catya bento head from CATWA

Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz

Lara mesh body Maitreya

Christy dark skin Lara Hurley

Shot on location at La Vie

Décor Jazz

Décor Jazz

Yesterday I arrived home from work basically in tears.

Office bullies are my greatest despise.

They come in all shapes and guises and you least expect it when it happens to you.

I didn’t expect to overhear the discussions whispered at high volume or notice the interrogation of my work by someone who is famously and I mean famously incompetent. But I did.

It hurt.

You see two of the people involved both are highly unprofessional women who have major flaws in the workplace.

One for being basically paid a high wage and not doing her job properly for the last 5 years and the other for her poor behaviour in the office regarding her colleagues and the way she can treat them. Add to that open gossip about other team members in an open plan office.

Back to the first women. She has been protected from disciplinary action from two line manages because of her friendship with the grandparent manager.

If she hadn’t had that protection she would have been out of a job at the very least 3 years ago.

The other is simply great at her actress skills when line management are about.

So yesterday I was in the fire line for their toxic collaboration. It felt awful and today I’m unsure how I feel.

Suffice to say I am not one to tolerate being bullied. That is why I became a union rep in the first place.

Bullies have no right to be in any workplace, school or social environment.

So anyhow I went home and decided to immerse myself in something else.

Another attempt at decor.

Thank you to Raindale for letting me use your land to film.

Video:-

Credits:-

Otterbury Platform from Raindale at the Décor Circle at Tres Chic

Kenward House and Welcome post, the fall edition from Raindale at the Spoonful of Sugar Festival

Oak tree and wild grass from Little Branch

Wild lavender potted plant from Dutchie

Field grass pampas (surrounding house) from Hayabusa Design

Woodhurst dining set from Raindale

Summer garden hanging plants from {what next}