I do love a good chat. Today despite feeling pretty drained all day. After a half hour catnap after work I felt a little more alive.
So spoke my vlog. To be fair it took me a couple of goes as the first one I prattled on far too long. I made an executive decision to bin that one as frankly it was maybe just a little too real for anyone.
I often try and free mind myself that my channel is a virtual related one. However it’s difficult for me as I’m always being me.
Anyhow if you do choose to listen, I’d suggest a good cuppa as well.
Video:-
Credits:-
Nia top and shorts from 28LA at the Access Event until the 8th April
I made this video public before the blog. Sometimes I figure I’ll just test out my finger press and go with it.
I made this video as a source of expression as to how I’m currently feeling. Very caged and angst and having to remind myself that it’s ok. I’m not alone, even if at times it feels it.
The beauty of being virtually creative is that we see our own images and express them in our own ways. Our choice of dress, emotive, dance and music.
I’ve always been lucky to come across some good talent within Epidemic Sound and the lady who sings in this video Gloria Tells is one I love listening to.
Bev is in the jungle doing her ASMR thing and today it’s all about the animals.
Funnily and I do mean funnily, I actually really enjoy doing Bevs videos. A lot of the time there’s parody within them but I actually do appreciate the sounds myself.
Relaxation is sometimes harder now than it was previously mainly because our shell (homes) are no longer our castles as such and the desire to get out of them or get people out of them for quiet is harder. We are simply now co existing looking forward to living large.
Roll on ASMR.
Today’s video is courtesy of EQUAL10 and the ACCESS events.
I mean I’m not right now standing outside wearing panties and pasties. Heaven forbid. It’s rather cold!!!
It’s my lunch break and I’m actually sitting on my sofa drinking tea and eating lunch.
The sight is track pants, sweater and looking like I’ve not really slept in a long while.
It’s Friday and away goes another week of life that I frantically would like to get back and change. As you know I’ve been experiencing a hyperglycaemic period which is something very new to me.
It was very upsetting as well as surreal as no one was listening until I spoke to the 111 service. Yesterday I had blood tests I was told to expect back next week.
They were it appears returned late to the surgery yesterday and a GP had to ring me which he did early this morning.
As a result it confirmed that I was not ok and they’re sending me extra medication. I have to double the lot I take now by slowly introducing in the next week and I’ll be retested in 3 months. If it doesn’t work then it’s injections. Something I really wasn’t expecting.
I don’t want that in my life. I struggle just to do my prick tests so that thought bothers me huge time. So fingers crossed I don’t end up there.
Apparently my reads are worse than when I was initially diagnosed so I have to make huge lifestyle changes.
Covid impact? Yes . Life has been harder during this year and I guess lack of my lifestyle activities has had a huge impact. On top of that the depression I feel about lack of people contact.
I’m not alone I know. So maybe we should set up a friends group for people who struggle?
Anyhow think on that. Back to work I go. Saturday sale!!! Don’t forget.,
Credits:-
Satin Doll ruffle panties and panties from Entice for the Saturday Sale
It’s 10 pm here U.K. time and unlikely I’ll get much sleep tonight.
I’m exhausted to be honest but I also don’t feel I can go to bed. I’ve had a really rubbish few days. Like really rubbish. I could have said days ago, Sunday, yesterday but I didn’t.
I try and just crack on as nothing worse than a whiner.
So I had the vaccine on the 12 March and ached a few days like an old woman. Job done all over.
Wednesday last week a headache started. Got bad Thursday night/Friday morning into Saturday. Apart from headaches felt ok if not more tired .
I put it all down to side effects.
Sunday started getting an odd nausea moment now and then. Monday comes and I’m literally buzzing and more awake and alert I’ve felt in a long time. On top of that I’ve been peeing like a ridiculous constant and can’t stop drinking.
Then the nausea gets worse and keeps coming. Then the sweating. In the meanwhile I’m starting to test my sugars to make sure I’m ok. They’re reading 23 then 21 and basically been that way a few days.
Today I tried to get a call back from a doctor at the GP surgery and instead I got a call back from a nurse. I describe what I’m feeling and that I’m constantly peeing and can’t satiate my thirst.
So the first thing she says in her why you wasting my time voice was to say in a gruff voice “why are you testing your sugars” errr I’m a diabetic!! Then proceeds to tell me I shouldn’t have to. Well gosh tell the doctor then as it’s the doctor that prescribed me the stuff to record my readings.
Nurse then proceeds to tell me I either have menopause or I may need a check as she thinks I have a prolapse!!! So yes what can I say at this point? What part of diabetic did she not hear.
But let’s make things worse. I said I need to be seen. So an appointment is made for me today at 3pm. Nope not see a doctor but the paramedic!! He who doesn’t know about diabetes at all.
It gets worse. So he takes my blood pressure. It’s high but he says he isn’t worried by it, takes a blood test to read the sugar, it’s high and he says I shouldn’t worry about it as it’s normal. So again my mouth was agape. ( in my masks). Anyone with a brain cell knows a diabetic should go above 12 at the worst but 21 that’s serious.
I hand him a bottle of pee and he asks me what for. Err to check my ketones as I’m a diabetic. so he dips the stick and says yes they’re a bit high but he isn’t worried.
Then he is about to dismiss me and I say ummm I’m feeling sick, I have a constant headache, I’m sweating, peeing and can’t get enough water and my stomach pain.
Apparently I need Gaviscon and to get my eyes tested as its maybe my vision causing me to feel this way.
Glad I was wearing a mask because under it I was looking at him mouthing the C U next Tuesday word.
No I really was.
I’ve got blood test on Thursday but here I am at home in pain, feeling sick and still got high sugars. It’s 10:30 pm and I can’t go sleep like this.
Moral of the story ? Right now the NHS is questionable.
But if you want to see how incompetent today was. Don’t take my word. The phot below the credits is a text message sent to me after my consultation on the phone with the nurse.
Apparently I’m a candidate to consider being checked for diabetes!!!! Oh an apparently referring to blood tests? I don’t need to say more!
I’ve become a real believer that when making dance videos you really need to see the dance.
I love a story in my videos but I’ve learnt those are for my own self indulgence and the most important thing is to show people what a dance looks like.
Well you won’t miss this one as it’s pretty sassy and check out the technique!!!
Anyhow I’m asleep by the time this is seen (scheduled) so let me know tomorrow what you think.
I love Sunday’s, I just wish they lasted longer than they do.
It’s probably the only day in the week I feel relaxed for even a brief moment. Then comes Sunday evening and I start to start winding up ready for another week.
Is anyone else like this?
If I think about it, is it because of current lives we are living now or the fact that I’m a miserable soul?
I’m a miserable soul if I’m alone in this feeling. But I doubt it.
All of us normal average working souls share this because we are not living our best lives.
My best life is certainly far from here back in Australia, being creative and feeling the sun each day.
My children and close friends all nearby and never a worry about work and it’s politics.
But then there is reality and I’m not rich and can’t just whisk everyone to where I want to be.
So Sunday evening comes and I start that heavy feeling of monotony again waiting for Friday.
In the meanwhile I think in my virtual life I’m looking rather savvy here and really ready for a spring encounter.
What you think? An afternoon tea maybe with scones and cream? P
The Cherry Boom Boom Dance Choreography Collection is a glimpse of the various dance numbers used in their show. Performance captured by dance team captain Sarah Johnstonn.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
About Cherry Boom Boom ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
A Modern-Day Rock-N-Roll Burlesque Show featuring A list dancers in Hollywood + Las Vegas created by Lindsley Allen, founding member/associate choreographer of the Pussycat Dolls.
