It arrives soon

It arrives soon

Halloween arrives soon Like that cousin you didn’t invite to the family party. Pumpkins are grinning, candles are lit, And my costume still looks like utter sh— nonsense (I don’t wear one I’m scary as it is) The shops sell cobwebs for £5 a strand, I can just leave my house unplanned! Kids want sweets, [...]

Dislocate

Dislocate

 I’m seeing a doctor today about my shoulder issues, which have quietly (and not so quietly) become worse over time. My shoulder has dislocated twice recently during a flare , just for a few seconds each time, but that’s enough to leave a deep ache and a quiet fear in the back of my mind. [...]

No night out

No night out

It was meant to be one of those calm, ordinary Saturdays. The kind where you potter about the house, do a bit of cleaning, and feel vaguely accomplished for it. I decided to tidy the living room and give the TV stand a proper clean. Nothing major, just one of those satisfying little jobs that [...]

The wall unit

The wall unit

Home is where the heart rests, not where the charger hides. Not where blue lights flicker or endless scroll collides. A wall unit waits instead solid, steady, kind. It holds the books, the frames, the little treasures you find. No pings, no beeps, no endless chase, just shelves with room for time and grace. More [...]

OnlyFans: The Gym Membership for Your Right Hand

OnlyFans: The Gym Membership for Your Right Hand

Subscribing to OnlyFans doesn’t make you a bad person. It just makes you a very specific kind of person. A financial wanker. A romantic wanker. A digital-age, algorithmically ignored wanker. But hey someone’s making money. And it’s not you. It’s Becky. In a Pikachu onesie. Eating a banana. For £9.99. Happiness one hand at a [...]

Can’t Hoover

Can’t Hoover

I can’t Hoover. But, I can move my arm to around waist level now. My shoulder did its thing again last week for the millionth time. However hoping to see the doctor because after 11 years of shoulder issues on and off this was the worst. Why? Because twice when I attempted to do something. [...]

Results

Results

I need some help right now. I feel pretty alone as I live alone and simple things such as a basket of fruit n veg I can’t pop out and get. I need my rubbish emptied and taken out and frankly I need someone to unscrew my bottle of water! Yesterday two things happened. I [...]

Wi Fi looks better on me

Wi Fi looks better on me

My avatar doesn’t just wear a bikini, she inhabits it. She struts down digital beaches like she’s starring in a music video. Her waist is snatched, her hips are perfection, and her thighs curvy but athletic. She’s the version of me that never apologizes for existing in high definition. No tan lines. No belly rolls. [...]