Despite the outward faces of many.
Faces of resilience, strength bravado, the truth is that many of us suffer silently in our dark moments and only the few around us will know those moments.
I am currently within my dark time and struggling to surpass this.
There are many reasons for the darkness. The most real one is work. The struggle to walk in each day and smile at the people who make many of our lives difficult.
I guess mine is compounded by the fact that I know it’s not all in my head because of the role I do as a union representative.
I face those managers who behave like non humans to their employees and I first hand see the manipulations of situations and the effects these have on staff.
You see from my perspective as both a participant and a spectator, going to work in an environment of toxicity is certainly one of the most damaging and dangerous positions many people face each day. The destruction of a person within a toxic work environment is very real.
When an employee cannot trust the person that is there to over see them (the manager) it is almost akin to an abusive domestic relationship. Violence removed.
I go back to 2015 when an employee commited suicide because of work.
The reason for my darkness is that in 2015 on the 20th January a person who I was helping in the work place took her life because of how she felt treated.
My darkness comes and goes over that and on the whole I deal with it with more resilience. But this week it’s sat on my shoulders as the background to many other things going on at work.
I find myself still asking why the manager who acted as the catalyst to the situation received promotion . I ask myself does this manager sleep well at night.
I see her often in passing. She scurries past me because she knows the blame I place at her feet. The family and me. She looks well rested. She has since the day it happened.
Moral of the story. You are much safer at home.
If you or someone you know is suffering speak to someone. Don’t go silently.
There are supports available.
Cowgrl aqua gown from Saschas Designs
Camilla hair from enVOGUE
Shimmer eyeshadow from A R T E in the December Powderpack
Natural lip balm from A R T E at the Chapter Four
You don’t know pose from Luanes World at Tres Chic
Catya bento head from CATWA
Angel shape for the Catya head LizBitz
Lara mesh body Maitreya
Christy dark skin Lara Hurley
Shot on location at Luanes World